Sure_as_Suresh 16 day.agoEvery day, a man goes to a newspaper kiosk, buys a paper, glances at the front page, frowns, and walks away.After weeks of this, the kiosk owner finally asks: "Why do you only look at the front page and never read the rest?" The man replies: "I'm looking for an obituary." Confused, the owner says: "But obituaries are in the back pages, in small print." The man calmly responds: "The one I’m waiting for will be on the front page."
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You have to drop the bomb twice before she gets the message.
None. They can’t change anything.
Because he couldn't keep his Lilly alive.
Along with 500 passengers and an entire jet
the ride gets more annoying when the kid starts screaming.
...has never seen footage from 9/11.
You can’t pull her hair while you’re raping her
[removed]
According to his parents, he accidentally used the guest shower
Ignored, the attention seeking twat.
His foster family have obviously raised him to be a little prick...
I went to pick her up, and she fell for me instantly. It was a rough start, but after that - we were on a roll.
I remembered something my dad used to say to my mom, so I walked over to her and said, "Get a fucking grip, you stupid bitch."
I texted back, "Ok, see you when you get here!"
They found his head and shoulders behind the couch.
He only cums once a year
And then Wham!
Probably heroin
I'm beginning to think Pearl Harbor was an accident.
Too close to the gas chamber
-Sent from your iPhone-
But only one of my daughters does anal, so it's really no contest.
He ate an 11-year old bun.
They both disappear fast
Liquid is a legitimate state
Because they make the toys.
He's an underground artist now
Two black guys are walking down the street and see a sign that says turn white for $75 Black guy one: "Do you think it will work? Black guy two: "Only one way to find out." BG1: "I only have $50" BG2: "Well, I have $100, I'll go do it then give you my change BG1: "Let's do it then" BG2 goes in and fifteen minutes later comes out white as a ghost, wearing a brand new suit and carrying briefcase. BG1: "Holy shit it actually worked! Let me get that $25" BG2: "Fuck you, nigger. Get a job." ___________ xpost:r/sickipedia
A ransom note...
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best dad jokesjokes for adultHere, we’ve gathered the funniest dad jokes, jokes for kids, funny jokes, witty comebacks, and hilarious memes from across the web. Whether you need stress relief, a quick laugh, or the perfect icebreaker for social situations, we’ve got you covered!
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