gazzy360 6 year.agoLet's Offend Everyone!I came out of the chip shop with a meat & potato pie, large chips, mushy peas & a jumbo sausage. A poor homeless man sitting there said “I've not eaten for two days.” I told him, “I wish I had your will power! ​ I took my biology exam last Friday. I was asked to name two things commonly found in cells. Apparently "Blacks and Romanian Gypsies" were not the correct answers. ​ A fat girl served me in McDonald's at lunch time today. She said, “Sorry about the wait.” I said, “Don't worry dear. You might lose it eventually." ​ I walked past a black kid sitting at a bus stop, as I went into the bank. When I came out, he looked at me and said, “Any change?” I said “No, you're still black”. ​ Snow in the forecast! The TV weather girl said, she was expecting 8 inches tonight. I thought to myself, "Fat chance with a face like that!" ​ An Irish boy stands crying at the side of the road. A man asks him,“What's wrong?” The boy says,“Me ma is dead”. “Oh bejaysus,"the man says. “Do you want me to call Father O'Riley for you?” The boy replies, “No tanks mister. Sex is the last ting on my mind at the moment.” ​ Years ago it was suggested, that an apple a day kept the doctor away. But since all the doctors are now muslims, I've found that a bacon sandwich works better ! ​ Japanese scientists have created a camera with such an immensely fast shutter-speed, that it is now possible to take a photograph of a woman with her mouth shut. ​ I had a Trivia Competition in the bag until the very last question....which I got wrong. The question was, "Where do women have the curliest hair?" Apparently the correct answer was Fiji. ​ A woman has a medical at the doctors. “You are grossly overweight,” he says. “I want a 2nd opinion,” she exclaims. “OK. You're bloody ugly as well.” ​ That should more or less cover everyone !
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They said: "Don't worry, it's all in your mind."
I received a letter back saying thanks for the sleeping bags.
Because bitches like it when u call them beautiful.
Unfertilised.
Kid 1: "As if." Kid 2: "Yeah, just ask your sister." Kid 1: "I don't have a sister." Kid 2: "You will in about nine months."
You can’t be racist if you hate everyone equally!
Halfway.
- Oh no, my gum is bleeding again
as they turn the corner a hundred feet in front of them they see some skinheads standing outside the liquor store. The skinheads spot them and start running towards them. The two Jews panic and one says “Abe, Abe, Before we get mugged here’s that 20 bucks I owe ya”’
They both want to be real boys.
Give a man a fish, you’ve assumed a gender and offended a vegan.
Reload
Then I looked around my plane seat, and why is flight attendant nervous and everyone on the plane telling goodbye to their loved ones?
My slave is black
Snails, Hermit crabs, Homeless people
You can't milk a cow for 150 years
With a blender
Target is destroyed.
is good for brownie points.
In that no one would believe you if you said you had one.
Me neither
“I don’t know.” You sick fuck.
Unless if you need to film that rape scene
Cows usually live 20 years
It didn't cure him, but it sure as hell taught him what his ass was for!
I'll tell you later
more jokes Here waiting for you
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