Looking for a natural mood booster? Science agrees: laughter truly is medicine for the soul! Whether you need a quick pick-me-up, an icebreaker for awkward moments, or just want to spread joy, corny jokes are your secret weapon.
In this curated list, we’ve compiled the best dad-approved one-liners, groan-worthy puns, and cheeky quips guaranteed to deliver belly laughs. Share these crowd-pleasing jokes at work, family dinners, or parties—no prescription needed!
If they are black, you've got nothing to eat.
I woke up this morning and saw my wife sitting on the edge of the bed with two black eyes. "What the fuck happened to you?" I asked. "This is what happens when you drink 9 pints of lager," she replied. "That's bullshit," I said, looking in the mirror, "I drank 9 pints of lager last night and my face is fine."
A little girl goes into the shower with her mom. She looks up at her mothers' breasts and says "Mommy, when will I get those?" Her mother says "when you're older". A few days later she goes into the shower with her dad. She looks up at his penis and says "Daddy, when will I get one of those?" Her father says "when your mother leaves for work".
By the way, verb not adjective
I don't know, I just fly the fighter jet.
I'll begin: "ARE YOU READY, KIDS?"
Apparently, the politically correct term is "conjoined twins"...
A: Gagged
The trick is to always act surprised. Source: Frankie Boyle
Smile. I’ll count them.
...I said, "your wife wears a burqa, your 3 daughters all wear burqas, doesn't it get a bit confusing around the house?" He said "yes of course, last week I went upstairs in the night and accidentally had sex with my wife!" __________ Subscribe to r/sickipedia if you liked this joke
I'd have $1.74
Our thoughts and prayers go out to the hospital staff at this difficult time.
This kid asks his mother "am I more Jewish or black?" His mother replies "You shouldn't think of these things like that... Why do you care?" Kid tells his mother "Well, Billy Marcus down the street is selling his bicycle for $40. I wanted to decide whether to Jew him down to $20, or just steal it tonight."
He knows where all the naughty girls live
Because her mother always told her to enjoy the little things in life.
Blame the Russians
"All of mine sucked"
no one likes the black ones
So they don't get mistaken for feminists.
Santa goes down the chimney.
He marched straight up to the counter and said, "Hi, I'm tired of handouts, I want a job." The man behind the counter replied, "Your timing is amazing. We've just got a listing from a very wealthy man who wants a chauffeur/bodyguard for his nympho daughter. You'll have to drive around in a big white Mercedes, but the suits, shirts, and ties are provided. Because of the long hours of this job, meals will also be provided and you will also be required to escort the young lady on her overseas holidays. The salary package is $200,000 a year." The black man said, "Ah c'mon, you're bullshitting me!" The man behind the counter said, "Well, you started it!"
But have you ever made it all the way through an Ariana Grande concert without wanting to kill yourself?!
You get kicked out of the petting zoo.
"Is it because she cares about women's rights?" She asked. "No," I answered, "It's because she is fat and ugly."
You know he’s there because he’s guilty.
All the colors are straight.
You see her face everywhere
more jokes Here waiting for you
best dad jokesjokes for adultHere, we’ve gathered the funniest dad jokes, jokes for kids, funny jokes, witty comebacks, and hilarious memes from across the web. Whether you need stress relief, a quick laugh, or the perfect icebreaker for social situations, we’ve got you covered!
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