hayeshilton 4 year.agoThree contractors are bidding to fix a broken fence at the White House. One is from Chicago , another is from Tennessee , and the third is from Minnesota .All three go with a White House official to examine the fence. The Minnesota contractor takes out a tape measure and does some measuring, then works some figures with a pencil. "Well," he says, "I figure the job will run about $900: $400 for materials, $400 for my crew and $100 profit for me." The Tennessee contractor also does some measuring and figuring, then says, "I can do this job for $700: $300 for materials, $300 for my crew and $100 profit for me." The Chicago contractor doesn't measure or figure, but leans over to the White House official and whispers, "$2,700." The official, incredulous, says, "You didn't even measure like the other guys! How did you come up with such a high figure?" The Chicago contractor whispers back, "$1000 for me, $1000 for you, and we hire the guy from Tennessee to fix the fence." "Done!" replies the government official. And that, my friends, is how the new stimulus plan will work.........
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Because they can't accept change.
"Who's there?" "Michael J Fox"
then the son replies: mom I'm blind and mom says: exactly
Burn a body at the crematorium, you're being a, "respectful friend." However, do it at home and you're, "destroying evidence."
Take a look at their women’s rights,these are fucking jokes
Every time I ask for some they only give me a spoonful
Never mind, you probably won’t get it
Because women are objects
They both fall down when you hit them with an axe
I installed the French version.
And one left
r/thefairersex
Steven Hawkins in a house fire
A cure for stut stut stut stu stu st st st.... screw it, the cold!
A wet fart
CRAYONS!!!!!
Slavery.
They met on snapchat.
.
You can't have your cake or eat it.
LGBBQ
Women’s rights.
Dark humor
she would have $0.77
Stevie Wonder answering the iron.
"Yeah" she laughed, "but what can you do?" I said, "You could have tried landing on your feet rather than your face."
A pitbull coming from a playground.
He can’t smell 12 year old girls hair anymore
Everyone treats the black part preferentially but its the white part that they enjoy the most
more jokes Here waiting for you
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