Joker King - find funny jokes from here.

Very satisfying.

Never Baguette

He breaks his nose.

Because then the game would be called "Solved".

I remembered my instructor said you should never swerve or try and avoid an animal, it's dangerous and you can end up causing a more serious accident. You should always just hit it and keep on driving. Had to chase that cunt for miles across the fields before I got the fucker...

And I told her, being funny is the second best way to get a girl into bed. She asked "what's the best way?" I said "a big knife." She laughed and said "you're funny." I said "wise choice."

Two towers

He said, "What are you doing daddy?" "It's called wanking," I replied. "You'll be doing this soon." "Why, daddy?" he asked. "Because my arm is fucking killing me."

The boy says, "Dad what's that big hairy thing between your legs?" Dad replies, "That's your sisters head, son."

There's no definitive proof that thousands of Russians have entered Ukraine.

About how easy it is to decapitate a head

The doctor replies, "Alright, but in order to turn you into a black man, I'm going to have to darken your skin by 70%, reduce your brain mass by 20%, and add 4 inches to your penis." The white guy eagerly agrees to this and goes in for the operation. After the operation, the doctor says to the formerly white guy, "I'm so sorry... there was a mix up in your surgery notes. I ended up darkening your skin by only 20%, increasing your brain mass by 70%, and deducting 4 inches off your penis. Is there any way that you could ever forgive me?" The former white guy replies, "謝謝"

I went to a party last night. I thought I looked pretty smart but some Jewish cunt decided she wanted to ruin my night. She yelled out over the crowd, "The '70s called. They want their shirt back!" I replied, "The '40s called. Your shower's ready." ___ (No karma for me please - the joke was swiped from the link below) http://www.sickipedia.org/racism/jew/i-went-to-a-party-last-night-i-thought-i-1181559

They have to give the donkey a break at some point.

They did unspeakable things to her

Ashe

Because everything is a steal

I'm fucking retarded.

Obviously not 8 because my basement is still dark.

Chemotherapy.

Because it’s cheaper than chemotherapy.

I'd probably get robbed by a black guy

The church has a sign that says "convert to Christianity and get 50$" one man says to the other "Morty, I'm thinking about doing it." The man enters the church and comes out half an hour later. Morty asks "did you get your fifty dollars?" The man replies "is that all you people think about?"

shame he spends all his time on the dashboard.

They're both excellent polish removers

Most of the jokes on this sub.

“Because a kid at school is selling a bike for $50 and I want to know if I should talk him down to $40 or just steal it

He orders a beer.

All the great ones are white.

Ahmed Al Sheriah ………………………………"here" Mustafa Al Sheriah …………………………….."here" Fatima El Bindiri ……………………………….."here" Ali Acmah Shabeeb ……………………………"here" Ali Sun Al En ……………………..No answer Ali Sun Al En? Little girl at the back stands up and yells ........ "It's pronounced Alison Allen, for fuck sake !" _____ xpost - r/sickipedia