When they get there, St. Peter says, "We only have one rule here in heaven: don't step on the ducks!" So they enter heaven, and sure enough, there are ducks all over the place. It is almost impossible not to step on a duck, and although they try their best to avoid them, the first woman accidentally steps on one. Along comes St. Peter with the ugliest man she ever saw. St. Peter chains them together and says, "Your punishment for stepping on a duck is to spend eternity chained to this ugly man!" The next day, the second woman accidentally steps on a duck and along comes St. Peter, who doesn't miss a thing. With him is another extremely ugly man. He chains them together with the same admonishment as for the first woman. The third woman has observed all this and, not wanting to be chained for all eternity to an ugly man, is very, VERY careful where she steps. She manages to go months without stepping on any ducks, but one day St. Peter comes up to her with the most handsome man she has ever laid eyes on ... very tall, long eyelashes, muscular, and thin. St. Peter chains them together without saying a word. The happy woman says, "I wonder what I did to deserve being chained to you for all of eternity?" The guy says, "I don't know about you, but I stepped on a duck!"
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then the son replies: mom I'm blind and mom says: exactly
Burn a body at the crematorium, you're being a, "respectful friend." However, do it at home and you're, "destroying evidence."
Take a look at their women’s rights,these are fucking jokes
Every time I ask for some they only give me a spoonful
Never mind, you probably won’t get it
Because women are objects
They both fall down when you hit them with an axe
I installed the French version.
And one left
r/thefairersex
Steven Hawkins in a house fire
A cure for stut stut stut stu stu st st st.... screw it, the cold!
A wet fart
CRAYONS!!!!!
Slavery.
They met on snapchat.
.
You can't have your cake or eat it.
LGBBQ
Women’s rights.
Dark humor
she would have $0.77
Stevie Wonder answering the iron.
"Yeah" she laughed, "but what can you do?" I said, "You could have tried landing on your feet rather than your face."
A pitbull coming from a playground.
He can’t smell 12 year old girls hair anymore
Everyone treats the black part preferentially but its the white part that they enjoy the most
I don’t fuck the pizza before I eat it
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