OZFox42 2 day.agoSuperman is hovering over the skies of Metropolis...He notices Wonder Woman sunbathing nude on the rooftop of a luxurious hotel suite, so he thinks to himself; "Hmm, if I can fly faster than the speed of light, I can probably have sex with her and she won't even know what happened!" He swoops down to where she is, does the deed, then flies away with a big smile. Startled, Wonder Woman says, "What the hell was that?" "I don't know but my ass hurts," replied The Invisible Man.
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In this curated list, we’ve compiled the best dad-approved one-liners, groan-worthy puns, and cheeky quips guaranteed to deliver belly laughs. Share these crowd-pleasing jokes at work, family dinners, or parties—no prescription needed!
The difference is pull start or push start.
Hey guys, my best friends name is allison. Her name rhymes with nothing. My name rhymes with everything. She came up with an admittedly hilarious and very mean nickname for me the other day (all in good fun) and we are trying to make one for her now too. I'll take anything no matter how inappropriate. This request broke 2 different AI generators because I guess AI is bad at being mean, so now I'm turning to the professionals, please help us reddit.
Danny Fentanyl
to D.E.I
Two guys watching a flint Michigan basketball game. One guy says “man this Flint team is really good, what are they putting in the water over there?” The other guy says “lead”.
What do you call an incarcerated illegal immigrant while they’re in the states? Locked in alien.
I missed coworker said I didn't make it. I replied neither did he.
The antisemitic kid says: maybe we'll have to send him to concentration camp.
Am I mean or not
I was cumming for the kids
Toys for Twats.
Because of ICE essay
Girl 1: What do I do? Girl 2: What's wrong? Girl 1: I think my boyfriend got me pregnant Girl 2: is it too late? Girl 1: about 2 months now Girl 2: Damn Girl 1: My mom's gonna kill me Girl 2: I bet that baby's thinking the same thing
It’s when you see your mother in law is falling down the cliff in your new Mercedes
My mum turns 76 tomorrow and I wanted to get her something really special. I thought one of those 4,000-week calendars (the average life expectancy) would be perfect. To personalise it, I've filled in nearly all the boxes for her—just the last line left blank for her to finish. She'll be touched, right?
Came out of the cabinet
On YouTube, "Full day of eating" videos are all the rage among fitness influencers. Well, here's my idea to parody this trend: Title: *Full day of eating (disorder)* Video: An anorexic girl eats a slice of lemon, video ends.
But now it just doesn’t work.
A Slap Happy Jappy with a Crap happy pappy
Set a homeless man on fire and you keep him warm for the rest of his life.
I guess his song finally killed her.
He’s Going Underground…
Host: " Tell me a word which I don't know and you win a prize " Phone rings Caller: " Word is goan. Spelt g o a n" Host: "Can you use it in a sentence please" Caller:" Goan f...k yourself" Host hans up Phone rings again Caller:" Word is tsmee. Spelt t s m e e” Host: "Can you use it in a sentence please" Caller:" Tsmee again. Goan f…k yourself"
“I know” says the guy, “but she’s a good cook and the kids like her.”
The pink parts are good but the heads are full of shit.
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Gender reveal parties for seven year olds
Whats the difference between an escaped prisoner and an orphan? The prisoner is wanted. What’s an orphans favourite flower? Self-raising What does an orphan call a family photo? A Wishlist.
more jokes Here waiting for you
best dad jokesjokes for adultHere, we’ve gathered the funniest dad jokes, jokes for kids, funny jokes, witty comebacks, and hilarious memes from across the web. Whether you need stress relief, a quick laugh, or the perfect icebreaker for social situations, we’ve got you covered!
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