jokeKing logo

Joker King - find funny jokes from here.

avatar Fantasy____ 10 year.agoWhat begins with N and ends with R that you never want to call a black man?

"Neighbor" OP:u/paszdahl2 in r/ImGoingToHellForThis

323
12
Recommend Jokes

Looking for a natural mood booster? Science agrees: laughter truly is medicine for the soul! Whether you need a quick pick-me-up, an icebreaker for awkward moments, or just want to spread joy, corny jokes are your secret weapon.

In this curated list, we’ve compiled the best dad-approved one-liners, groan-worthy puns, and cheeky quips guaranteed to deliver belly laughs. Share these crowd-pleasing jokes at work, family dinners, or parties—no prescription needed!

funny dad jokes

funny dad jokes
1. If a Muslim beats his wife...

Is it domestic violence or child abuse?

2. How did PMS get its name?

"Mad cow disease" was already taken.

3. What’s the main thing about jewish football?

To get the quarter back.

4. How many Jews can you fit in a car

I depends on how many ash trays the car has

5. What's the difference between cancer jokes and kids with cancer?

Cancer jokes get old after awhile.

6. Why are there no Japanese Bingo players?

Every time somebody calls, "B-29," they seem to disappear.

7. Anthony Bourdain is going to be the new host of Hell's Kitchen.

8. I failed my biology test today.

They asked me what is most commonly found inside cells. Turns out black people wasn't the right answer.

9. What's the difference between a hippie girl and a hockey player?

The hockey player showers after 3 periods.

10. Why aren't Kobe Bryant's critics saying anything now?

Because he finally passed

11. I cant wait for Harriet Tubman to be on the $20 bill

I can finally use black people as currency again.

12. What do 4 teenage girls and storage containers have in common?

They’re all in my basement.

13. Jacob survived the Holocaust, but his family did not. Angrily, Jacob raises his fist to the sky and shouts, "God, give me back my family!"

A few seconds later, a big load of fine ashes is poured down on Jacob and a deep voice from above roars, "Here you are, Jacob." Jacob looks down, then he looks up and shyly adds, "They also had gold teeth."

14. "Mum, I had sex with my school teacher today."

The boy's mother looked disgusted. "WHAT!? You go and tell your father right away!" The boy approached his father." Dad, I had sex with my school teacher today". His mother was shaking her head in disgust. The boy's dad frowned, then said "WELL DONE, SON! You're a man now." The boy's mother threw her arms up and stormed out. "To congratulate you, I'll take you to buy that bicycle you've wanted for a while, right now!" So the father and son buy the bike and leave the shop. As the pair walk, with the boy pushing the bike, the proud father asks "why aren't you riding your new bike, son?" The boy replies, "because my arse is still killing me, Dad".

15. A man walks up to a woman in a bar and says, "You're going to get laid tonight".

A bit surprised, she asks, "Really? How do you know that? Are you psychic?" "No, I'm just stronger than you."

16. Rihanna "Oh na na, what's my name"

Chris "Fuck, I hit her a bit too hard this time".

17. When Kurt Cobain was young . . .

... his mother told him not to play with guns. But it went in one ear and out the other. [Source] (http://www.sickipedia.net/j/Crime/Suicide/46218)

18. If I had a dollar for every time I was racist

Black people would rob me.

19. My wife tricked me into having sex with her last night.

She slept in our daughter's room.

20. Everyone tells me I'm average...

That's just mean...

21. What do you get when you spell "Man" backwards?

Flashbacks.

22. "Dad, how do stars die?"

“Usually an overdose.”

23. Back in the 50's you could beat your wife and get away with it.

Now you have to play in the NFL :(

24. In a mental institution...

A zoophile, a sadist, a murderer, a necrophile, a pyromaniac and a masochist are all sitting on a bench in a mental institution, bored out of their minds. "How about having sex with a cat?" asks the zoophile. "Let's have sex with the cat and then torture it," says the sadist. "Let's have sex with the cat, torture it, and then kill it," shouts the murderer. "Let's have sex with the cat, torture it, kill it and then fuck it again," says the necrophile. "Let's have sex with the cat, torture it, kill it, fuck it again and then burn it," says the pyromaniac. Silence took over, and then the masochist says: "Meow."

25. I have down syndrome and my gf called me a retard after she got frustrated with me. Few days later I replied:

I might be a retard, but at least I’m not fucking one.

26. Hey, it’s not drinking alone if you’re pregnant.

27. An annoying woman created a Facebook account for her unborn baby...

So I created an account with the name Coathanger and poked it.

28. Do midgets start their story with “when I was little”?

29. What happens when you throw a molotov cocktail into a gay pride parade?

LGBBQ

30. I saved a Muslim family of 4 that were drowning in Houston yesterday...

As a jpeg. _______________ Please take a look at r/sickipedia if you found this joke sick enough.

more jokes Here waiting for you

best dad jokesjokes for adult
Welcome to Joker King – Your Daily Dose of Happiness!

Here, we’ve gathered the funniest dad jokes, jokes for kids, funny jokes, witty comebacks, and hilarious memes from across the web. Whether you need stress relief, a quick laugh, or the perfect icebreaker for social situations, we’ve got you covered!

Feeling down? Click in—guaranteed smiles! 😆