wackoclown 6 year.agoA college professor started to notice that one of his students, Dave, started gaining lots of female attention.So, one day he asks Dave about his secret. Dave replies: "Well, before sex I simply whip out my willy and smack it against the bedside table, like a hammer. It numbs it up and makes me last longer". Later that day, the professor gets home to his wife and finds her in the shower - a welcome opportunity for sex. So, he quickly undresses and starts banging his dick against the dresser, just before hearing his wife calling from the shower: "Dave, is that you?".
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To beat the crowd.
They don’t want to get caught steeling from your car
Didn’t John F Kennedy promise to serve a full term?
It was my aunt’s babyshower
V-Guard
But it was no use. Diego and Jose shoved the cocaine up my ass and sent me back over the border.
They are similar to the new macOS, a big sur
Because it's everyday bro
does anybody know why this Muslim guy keep on saying crazy w o r dddd ssssss
Pull the pin and throw it back
When she burps, you hear babies cry
Chinkies!
Pig roast
"choking noises"
How can you tell that your acne is really getting out of hand? The blind starts reading your face.
Put a scratch and sniff sticker at the bottom of a pool.
“Ow, my spine!”
They’ll just hold you down, Look what happened to Kobe
One says to the other, let’s go in and get shitfaced.
She forgot to take the tissue out of the box.
He was born black Died blacker
Especially when you realise there isn't a cyclist on it.
He spots a pretty girl at the end of the bar and approaches her. ‘Would you like to dance?’ he asks her. ‘I really don’t like this song,’ she replies, ‘and even if I did I wouldn’t dance with you.’ ‘I don’t think you heard me correctly,’ says the man. ‘I said you look fat in those pants.’
The unemployment line.
because i'm a necrophiliac pedophile.
Until it went into labor Edit: Until it had a miscarriage
After a bullets killed someone it’s been fired
By placing a half eaten sandwich in their hand
Coral
more jokes Here waiting for you
best dad jokesjokes for adultHere, we’ve gathered the funniest dad jokes, jokes for kids, funny jokes, witty comebacks, and hilarious memes from across the web. Whether you need stress relief, a quick laugh, or the perfect icebreaker for social situations, we’ve got you covered!
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