squeth 6 year.agoDid you know that a piranha can devour a human child to the bone in 30 seconds?Anyways, I lost my job at the aquarium today.
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Because kids say the darnest things
Optimistic!
Prophets are going through the roof!
You stop milking a cow after 15 years.
An auction
at least thats what she told her friends.
There once a thug named brown, who bum rushed a cop with a frown, six bullets later, he met his creator, and his homies burnt down the town
/r/MeanJokes
Doubling Down
Once it starts bleeding it's time to flip her over to the brown side
The lights out. How can you count them?
Both spend more time in your wallet than on your dick
Reverse racism is when you back up over him again after.
I'd say Hillary. According to Bill, she never goes down.
Mediterranean Sea
Little Johnny wakes up one night hearing strange noises from his parent's bedroom. He opens the door to his parents room and sees mom, handcuffed to the bed's headboard, dad ramming her from behind. Johnny screams. Dad turns to looks at him, laughs and gives mom a slap on the bum for good measure. Johnny runs away, screaming. Once dad has finished mom off, he uncuffs her. She immediately says, 'You better go tell Johnny everything is OK, the shit he just saw could scar him for life". Dad rolls his eyes and begrudgingly agrees. Pulls on his robe and heads for Johnny's room only to find it's empty. He then heads for the TV room but when he passes the guest room, he notices the door is ajar, noises coming from inside. He opens the door to look in and sees Granny on her hands and knees, little Johnny fucking her from behind. Dad screams. Johnny turns around looks at him and says "Yeah, not so funny when it's your mom huh?"
At least he died doing the thing he loved, painting the walls.
To know which way his parents went.
They kill your dog.
and I thought to myself "hey that could be mine!", then I remembered mine was at home shining my boots.
I'm not gonna leave a bag of cocaine in the car all day.
Yo mama so slutty, she got fired from the sperm bank for drinking on the job.
My wife suffers from a drinking problem. Oh, your wife is an alcoholic? No, I am. She’s the one who suffers.
Neither works without a chain.
I'm not sure what she was more upset about: that I was fucking our daughter, or that the abortion clinic let me bring her home.
He lived at home until he was 30, was homeless for two years and wound up on death row
Not really good for anything, but make you smile when you push them down the stairs.
maybe that's why they get paid less.
There's never any dental records and all the DNA is the same.
more jokes Here waiting for you
best dad jokesjokes for adultHere, we’ve gathered the funniest dad jokes, jokes for kids, funny jokes, witty comebacks, and hilarious memes from across the web. Whether you need stress relief, a quick laugh, or the perfect icebreaker for social situations, we’ve got you covered!
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