Narwahl_Whisperer 6 year.agoA drunk guy is showing friends his new apartment...The last stop is the bedroom, where a big brass gong sits next to the bed. ​ "What's that gong for?" the friend asks him. ​ "It's not a gong," the drunk replies. "It's a talking clock." ​ "How does it work?" ​ The guys picks up a hammer, gives the gong an ear-shattering pound, and steps back. ​ Suddenly, someone on the other side of the wall screams, "For God's sake, you asshole...it's 3:30 in the god damn morning!"
Looking for a natural mood booster? Science agrees: laughter truly is medicine for the soul! Whether you need a quick pick-me-up, an icebreaker for awkward moments, or just want to spread joy, corny jokes are your secret weapon.
In this curated list, we’ve compiled the best dad-approved one-liners, groan-worthy puns, and cheeky quips guaranteed to deliver belly laughs. Share these crowd-pleasing jokes at work, family dinners, or parties—no prescription needed!
I’d rather be a fruit than a vegetable.
A firecracker
A flamongo .
...they treat food recipes like sex, they keep it in the family.
Ooga Boogaloo
A bath bomb
So I just burned her for good
Your dads dick tastes funny
Her miscarriage
'You know what? You are a better fuck than our moter' She says: 'Yes, I know, dad told me that.'
We have to give props to kobe, I mean he was the only black father to take their kids with him
Your computer doesn't freak out when you accidentally cum on it.
Because at night the sky is dark
Cracker with cheese
At least we know why he kept making all those child prodigy videos now
Me and my sister were talking to my baby sister and I jokingly said”do you understand me” after talking. So my sister (not baby sister) says,“I don’t think she speaks weirdo”. So I said,”then why are you talking to her”. And she was so shocked and grumpy she didn’t talk to me for a while.
A woman with no rights
They vote
Cause they’ve got a lot on their chest
At least 600,000 babies per year would disagree.
Ginger Ale
Her mom follows her into the basement and doesn’t see the body. “April fools!” The little girl exclaims, “he did it in the garage!”
For example, when you shove them down the stairs.
If you missed the showing in Seattle, don't worry, you can still catch it in Atlanta, Minneapolis, NY, Portland, and More TBD.
It was then that dave found out that his wife who had Alzheimer's had progressed so badly that she forgot her husband
"Me-Don't Worry, It'll End Soon." "Me-Ok, Ok, That's The Last One fr." Next Week- Everyone, Crying, In The Graveyard.
Go stand in front of a mirror
An adoption agency
On an unrelated note, Charlie Daniels wasn’t that good at the violin.
more jokes Here waiting for you
best dad jokesjokes for adultHere, we’ve gathered the funniest dad jokes, jokes for kids, funny jokes, witty comebacks, and hilarious memes from across the web. Whether you need stress relief, a quick laugh, or the perfect icebreaker for social situations, we’ve got you covered!
Feeling down? Click in—guaranteed smiles! 😆
