So, he’s on death row and the executioner approaches him. “What would you like for your last meal?” “I would like a banana please.” The executioner thinks it’s weird, but shrugs and gives him a banana. The guy eats his banana, waits a while, and gets strapped into the electric chair. When the flip the switch, nothing happens! In Bulgaria, such an act of divine intervention means you get released. A few months go by, and the train driver has been working for a new company. Well, old habits die hard, and he falls asleep again, killing 2 people this time. The court has no patience for recklessness, so he ends up on death row again. After a while, the same executioner from last time approaches him. “You again? Dang! What do you want this time?” “Two bananas please.” The executioner shrugs and hands him two bananas. A bit weird, but whatever. There’s no way he can cheat death twice! But, when they flip the switch, nothing happens again. The train driver walks a second time. Some time passes, and the executioner is very busy. After another few months, the same dude shows up, apparently having run over 3 people with a train. Exacerbated, the executioner approaches him for the third time. “Let me guess. Three bananas?” “Actually yes! How did you know?” “Too bad! This has gone on long enough. No more bananas! Today you fry.” So, the train driver gets strapped into the chair with no last meal. But, when they flip the switch, nothing happens again. “I don’t get it,” says the executioner. “I didn’t let you eat any bananas!” “It’s not the bananas.” Sighed the prisoner. “I’m a very bad conductor.”
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“Yes,” replies the murderer. “Can you please hold my hand?”
With crucifixion they throw out the whole Jew.
God said “You’re right. Give the dumb one a cunt.”
Throw a frying pan in an Ethiopians face.
I got a couple: What was the last thing to go through Diana's mind? The stereo. Why did princess Diana cross the road? She wasn't wearing her seatbelt. What do princess Diana and Pink Floyd have in common? The wall was their last big hit.
Abusing of your wife is just so stupid. It's YOUR wife. That's like keying your own car.
If they are under 12 just do them in your head
Polly want a Cracker
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Too soon?
Hey kid, wanna buy some candy?
For reference this is a joke from a friend, but what would you call a baby being thrown or yeeted. My friend said it’s still fetus deletus???
Duterte only talks about raping women.
It doesn't have a home page.
FANNUM IS A FATASS
It doesn't matter what you call it, he isn't coming!
She rejects you.
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An LGBBQ.
Christopher Walken
Because Mad Cow Disease was already taken.
Tom Cruise can’t take a joke
You know she's going to swallow
Wipe your dick clean on the curtains.
The Drake Equation
Because they got a history of separating the colors
The jew. It's always business before pleasure
by saying yes
He joined the Que Que Que
more jokes Here waiting for you
best dad jokesjokes for adultHere, we’ve gathered the funniest dad jokes, jokes for kids, funny jokes, witty comebacks, and hilarious memes from across the web. Whether you need stress relief, a quick laugh, or the perfect icebreaker for social situations, we’ve got you covered!
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