A week after arriving back home in the States, he wakes one morning to find his penis covered with bright green and purple spots. Horrified, he immediately goes to see a doctor. The doctor, never having seen anything like this before, orders some tests and tells the man to return in two days for the results. After two days, the doctor tells him, “I’ve got bad news for you, you have contracted Mongolian VD. It’s very rare and almost unheard of here in the US. We know very little about it." The man perplexed asks, "Well, can’t you give me a shot or something to fix me up, Doc?" The doctor answers, "I’m sorry, there's no known cure. We are going to have to amputate your penis." The man screams in horror, "Absolutely not !! I want a second opinion... !!!" The doctor replies, "Well, it’s your choice. Go ahead, if you want, but surgery is your only option.” The next day, the man seeks out a Chinese doctor, figuring that he’ll know more about the disease. The Chinese doctor examines his penis and proclaims, "Ahh... yes, Mongolian VD. Very rare disease." The guy says to the doctor, "Yeah, yeah, I already know that, but what can we do? My American doctor wants to cut off my penis!" The Chinese doctor shakes his head and laughs, "Stupid Amelican docttah, always want operate, make more money that way. No need amputate!" "Oh, thank God!” the man exclaims. "Yes,” says the Chinese doctor. "Wait two weeks. Fall off by itself."
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In case he got a hole in one
It gets discharged. 🙂↕️
… are when your kids have had enough and skip the rolling of eyes altogether. They go from Dad joke to Dad choke in zero point to the door seconds.
But the broom is what swept the nation.
The photon replies, “No, I'm traveling light.”
But I came up Chort.
What’s a frog’s favorite band - The Beatles
Then I signed the letters ‘A’ ‘S’ ‘L’
I'll tell ya tomorrow!
I don't want to interrupt her.
She’s goes, “Yeah…that’s a stretch.”
I responded with “I didn’t know they could do that”
He got a little behind in his work!
No, but an Applewood
Me : I don't know. Dad : You can tuna a piano but you can't piano a tuna. Me : What about the pot of glue? Dad: I knew you'd get stuck on that.
Until knight fall.
If I was a dinosaur I would be a backasaurus. i came up with this on the spot, I'm really proud of it and I think it's a new one, has this been said/done before?
Or are they just blowing smoke?
Knott’s Dairy Farm.
Gen A!
Just like Franz to put all his love dreams in a Liszt.
“No son, have you seen my dad glasses?”
Back when I was young, our local parish priest was made a Canon. I asked my dad what a Canon was. His reply? “It’s a big shot in the Church.” Then he cracked up laughing, as he always did at his own jokes. RIP Dad. 15 years gone, and missed every single day.
Kill-A-Man-Jaro
Via the aquaducks!
I said sure, but it would probably be rough.
He stored them in his camel lot.
Read lips.
Their T-Thirt (teeth hurt).
He Dwayne's his Johnson.
more jokes Here waiting for you
best dad jokesjokes for adultHere, we’ve gathered the funniest dad jokes, jokes for kids, funny jokes, witty comebacks, and hilarious memes from across the web. Whether you need stress relief, a quick laugh, or the perfect icebreaker for social situations, we’ve got you covered!
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