MisterKpak 1 mon.agoA Sign above a bar says "Complete 3 tasks, win $1 Million"A man walks up to the bartender and says "Million dollars? I'm in, what do I have to do?" The bartender days "Task 1, there's a big guy at the end of the bar, he's loud and obnoxious and ruins everyone's enjoyment. I need you to go knock him out. Task 2, there is an alligator out back with an abscesses tooth. I need you to remove the tooth from that alligator. And finally, there's an 80-year-old woman upstairs that hasn't seen any...ehm...male companionship in many years. I need you to address that too. " The man says "Pour me 3 shots of tequila and I'll get it done". The bartender obliged. The man walks up to the big guy at the end of the bar, and without warning punches him square in the jaw. He falls backwards out of this stool, flayed out on the floor. After that, the man walks out the back door to go deal with the alligator, and the door closes behind him. All the bar hears is smashing, grunting, screaming, crashing, all kinds of racket. But eventually, the noise dies down. The man walks back into the bar, bleeding, limping, and with clothes torm to pieces. He goes to the bartender and says... "Alright, where's the lady with the bad tooth?"
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Snails, Hermit crabs, Homeless people
You can't milk a cow for 150 years
With a blender
Target is destroyed.
is good for brownie points.
In that no one would believe you if you said you had one.
Me neither
“I don’t know.” You sick fuck.
Unless if you need to film that rape scene
Cows usually live 20 years
It didn't cure him, but it sure as hell taught him what his ass was for!
I'll tell you later
The dog shit eventually turns white and stops stinking.
Slick her hair back she looks like a 4 year old boy.
I should try not to laugh so hard.
When they see an x and a y they get triggered.
To beat the crowd.
They don’t want to get caught steeling from your car
Didn’t John F Kennedy promise to serve a full term?
It was my aunt’s babyshower
V-Guard
But it was no use. Diego and Jose shoved the cocaine up my ass and sent me back over the border.
They are similar to the new macOS, a big sur
Because it's everyday bro
does anybody know why this Muslim guy keep on saying crazy w o r dddd ssssss
Pull the pin and throw it back
When she burps, you hear babies cry
more jokes Here waiting for you
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